or are you putting to paper what you hear in your head?"
Definitely the latter. Many times, I've wished for some way to attach electrodes to my forehead and think the music onto paper, rather than try to type it into Finale and have it evaporate in mid-phrase.
I never considered myself as having a problem melodically, although mine tend to be slow-moving rather than sprightly and I'm plagued by the urge to keep constant motion; it's difficult for me to write rests, as I desire a continuous flow. Everything seems to be quarters and eighths, too, as sixteenths somehow rarely seem appropriate. Perhaps that's the influence of my many years as a choral singer.
As for multiple teachers, that's usually not an option. Up here in ROME, NY, I wonder if there are any composers at all.
No, it's eluding me how others manage to write exciting, engaging music that people want to perform. With me, audiences mostly seem to like my stuff, but conductors and performers roll their eyes and ask, "Have you any IDEA how long this would take to rehearse?" Then they program something that sounds like cats in heat, only not as good. Let's just say the feedback from most of the composition teachers I've tried has not been encouraging, which is why I asked in the first place if one either "has it" or doesn't. To be sure, not everybody is a musical genius, but every time I try to think outside the Bachs, I wonder whether the effort is showing.
I can write pretty good melodies and interesting harmonies; my problem is large-scale structure: how to have a piece of music have an understandable emotional message with good transitions between sections and effective climaxes.
