Audition nerves

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ttf_MikeBMiller
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Audition nerves

Post by ttf_MikeBMiller »

I'm not sure where this needs to go, so mods feel free to move if needed.

I had a sub list audition for a nearby orchestra yesterday. To be honest, even if I had made the sub list, my chances of getting called to play were pretty close to zero, but I still wanted to do my best. I have only taken a few pro level auditions and this was the first time I ever did one with a screen.

The audition was in a small (about 400 seat) theater. I was playing the last movement of the Grondahl concerto and 6 excerpts. I felt like I was well prepared and had spent several weeks putting in a lot of time on this music and recording myself at home.

I got over there early and got warmed up and felt pretty good about everything. But as soon as I stepped on the stage, I got an instant attack of nerves. My heart rate sped up and my mouth went dry as a bone. Like an idiot, I did not take any water on stage with me. I struggled a bit with the concerto, chipping a few notes here and there until they cut me off. I actually managed to play the excerpts pretty well for a guy with a dry mouth. No major flubs, just the occasional small chip. I even made it through Bolero with no problems.

So I didn't make the sub list. I don't know if I would have without the dry mouth or not. From what I have heard, these guys don't add many people to that list anyway as they already have a lot of folks on it.

So, for you folks that do a lot of auditions - do the nerves get better with the more experience you have? Or is it something you have to deal with every time? Just wondering. Thanks!









ttf_harrison.t.reed
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Audition nerves

Post by ttf_harrison.t.reed »

Just pretend you already won the job.
ttf_robcat2075
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Audition nerves

Post by ttf_robcat2075 »

QuoteSo, for you folks that do a lot of auditions
I'm not one of those... but I'll note that best I have ever played at an audition was when I thought it was just an entrance-process formality and that there was zero chance I'd be making it into a top ensemble with the very serious players.

But I did make it into that top ensemble and ever since then I've been wondering how to recapture that total lack of concern for the result that I felt in those moments. I wish i could have had that in every presentation situation I've been in over the last 30 years.

I wasn't unprepared, I had prepared the material to the limit of my ability. However, I was completely focused on the playing in a way that I haven't been before or since because there were no worries intruding to distract me. I was sure that when I finished they would say "Thanks for coming by, the marching band meets at 4PM."  Image



Short version... hydration issues aside, I think this stuff is mostly mental. Elusive, but still mental.

ttf_Ellrod
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Audition nerves

Post by ttf_Ellrod »

Yogi: "Ninety percent of this game is half-mental."
ttf_savio
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Audition nerves

Post by ttf_savio »

I have always some nerves but when I perform often I control the situation better.

Leif
ttf_Dombat
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Audition nerves

Post by ttf_Dombat »

I probably played around 20 auditions before I started to have more successful ones and was nervous at every single one of them. It means you care about what you are playing and how you sound. Nothing wrong with that, you just need to learn how to control it.
For me, one of the biggest breakthroughs was minimising my processes and taking time. I took a piece of paper into auditions with my process. This included walking confidently in, greeting the panel or accompanist (if possible), setting everything up and then counting down fro 10 to 1 without thinking about anything other than the numbers. No thinking about the trombone or the excerpt or anything. After this I would take the excerpt to mind, tempo and music, pick up the trombone, breathe in tempo and let it go.
Taking time in an audition is very hard. Forcing myself to take the time helped me.

My other tips would be to take 3 or 4 positive ideas in with you. You said you made it through bolero. This means that you thought you wouldn't or you have a negative approach to playing it. Take your tempo, breathe and play clearly and cleanly... It needs practice but is it really that hard?

For me the positive ideas focus on a feeling for my body. Rather than the old 'just relax' I focus on strong engaged shoulder blades and activly breathing in. If I keep these in mind I can easily bring myself to a strong playing position. The other stuff happens in the weeks/months/years beforehand.

Enjoy playing and keep going at it.
ttf_Arrowhead99
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Audition nerves

Post by ttf_Arrowhead99 »

Quote from: robcat2075 on May 31, 2017, 09:58AMI'm not one of those... but I'll note that best I have ever played at an audition was when I thought it was just an entrance-process formality and that there was zero chance I'd be making it into a top ensemble with the very serious players.

But I did make it into that top ensemble and ever since then I've been wondering how to recapture that total lack of concern for the result that I felt in those moments. I wish i could have had that in every presentation situation I've been in over the last 30 years.

I wasn't unprepared, I had prepared the material to the limit of my ability. However, I was completely focused on the playing in a way that I haven't been before or since because there were no worries intruding to distract me. I was sure that when I finished they would say "Thanks for coming by, the marching band meets at 4PM."  Image



Short version... hydration issues aside, I think this stuff is mostly mental. Elusive, but still mental.


Excellent post Image
I also noticed from taking martial arts classes, the more relaxed you are the more power you have.
ttf_bigbassbone1
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Audition nerves

Post by ttf_bigbassbone1 »

In case it helps ill share my experience. For what its worth, ive taken a lot of auditions and been offered places at low acceptance rate schools as well as 2 full time professional jobs, one in a military band and one in a professional orchestra (I didnt accept either job offer though). I have also passed 3 auditions for sub lists in separate orchestras.

Your experience is extremely common. The first thing to note is that pretty much everyone is in the same boat and whilst different people experience different sensations the effect is usually the same. The key is to be focused. What that means is being able to set a "goal" in your mind and not let outside influences affect you. A big turning point in taking auditions for me, was the realization that just because my body feels a certain way under pressure does NOT mean it has to affect my playing negatively.

Before the audition, spend every day MENTALLY preparing how you are going to feel and prepare on the day. Imagine yourself waking up, eating a particular breakfast. Imagine travelling to the venue. Picture the warm up room. Imagine exactly what you will play in the warm up room. Imagine the venue for the audition. The screen, the stand and your music. Think about what you will need and write it down. Water bottle, valve oil, slide grease etc..... make sure that everything YOU have control over is covered. I do this every night before I go to sleep in the weeks leading up to an audition. Sometimes it takes me 5 minutes, sometimes an hour.

On the day, chances are that you will not feel awesome. Your chops might feel funny,  your hand might shake. Focus only on the sounds you want to portray in the actual audition. Noticing dry mouth or your heart rate will not help you in any way. Laugh them off, you can play trombone and have prepared as best you can so even if those things happen, it DOES NOT mean that you will play badly. In short, make the effort to ignore all negative influences, only hear in your head perfect versions of how you play. Tell yourself that regardless of what you feel, you can play well.

When the audition is actually happening, realise that there will be things that go wrong. I have never heard any big name players say that they gave a "perfect audition". The trick is that when something does go wrong, just let it go. Immediately focus on making the next bit as amazing as you possibly can. You cant do anything about a mistake that happened, spending any extra thought on it will only affect the music still to come. Wait until after the audition to worry about what went wrong and how you will fix it if you advance the round.

Again the short version, before an audition be prepared not just in your playing but know exactly what you will do for every minute in the lead up and during so there are no surprises. Ignore mistakes, they will not help you. Imagine only perfect playing before and during the audition. Ignore negative physical feelings. Its hard, but if you dont give yourself any room in your head to think about anything but your ideal performance it is definitely possible.
ttf_sonicsilver
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Audition nerves

Post by ttf_sonicsilver »

My experience is very like bigbassbones's. Everyone gets nervous sometimes and it can be a problem. Nothing to be ashamed of. I think there are two important factors in overcoming it.

Firstly, if you are really well prepared and all your material sounds great, you know this and you have earned your own confidence in yourself. There's no mind trick you can do on yourself to convince yourself that you're meticulously prepared and ready to blow the audience away, when you're not.

Secondly, there's just plain old concentration. In performance, if you're thinking about audience reaction or your last mistake or your trembling legs, what are you NOT thinking about? Yes, the music. And what SHOULD you be thinking about? Yes, the music. It takes an effort of will to concentrate in times of stress but this is something that can be nurtured during practice time too. How many times, in the practice room, have we flubbed the beginning of an excerpt and then restarted? We don't get to do that in the audition (or indeed in the orchestra after we've won the job) so it's not a valid way to practice playing.

ttf_crazytrombonist505
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Audition nerves

Post by ttf_crazytrombonist505 »

Quote from: bigbassbone1 on May 31, 2017, 09:21PMIn case it helps ill share my experience. For what its worth, ive taken a lot of auditions and been offered places at low acceptance rate schools as well as 2 full time professional jobs, one in a military band and one in a professional orchestra (I didnt accept either job offer though). I have also passed 3 auditions for sub lists in separate orchestras.

Your experience is extremely common. The first thing to note is that pretty much everyone is in the same boat and whilst different people experience different sensations the effect is usually the same. The key is to be focused. What that means is being able to set a "goal" in your mind and not let outside influences affect you. A big turning point in taking auditions for me, was the realization that just because my body feels a certain way under pressure does NOT mean it has to affect my playing negatively.

Before the audition, spend every day MENTALLY preparing how you are going to feel and prepare on the day. Imagine yourself waking up, eating a particular breakfast. Imagine travelling to the venue. Picture the warm up room. Imagine exactly what you will play in the warm up room. Imagine the venue for the audition. The screen, the stand and your music. Think about what you will need and write it down. Water bottle, valve oil, slide grease etc..... make sure that everything YOU have control over is covered. I do this every night before I go to sleep in the weeks leading up to an audition. Sometimes it takes me 5 minutes, sometimes an hour.

On the day, chances are that you will not feel awesome. Your chops might feel funny,  your hand might shake. Focus only on the sounds you want to portray in the actual audition. Noticing dry mouth or your heart rate will not help you in any way. Laugh them off, you can play trombone and have prepared as best you can so even if those things happen, it DOES NOT mean that you will play badly. In short, make the effort to ignore all negative influences, only hear in your head perfect versions of how you play. Tell yourself that regardless of what you feel, you can play well.

When the audition is actually happening, realise that there will be things that go wrong. I have never heard any big name players say that they gave a "perfect audition". The trick is that when something does go wrong, just let it go. Immediately focus on making the next bit as amazing as you possibly can. You cant do anything about a mistake that happened, spending any extra thought on it will only affect the music still to come. Wait until after the audition to worry about what went wrong and how you will fix it if you advance the round.

Again the short version, before an audition be prepared not just in your playing but know exactly what you will do for every minute in the lead up and during so there are no surprises. Ignore mistakes, they will not help you. Imagine only perfect playing before and during the audition. Ignore negative physical feelings. Its hard, but if you dont give yourself any room in your head to think about anything but your ideal performance it is definitely possible.

Excellent advice  Image
ttf_MikeBMiller
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Audition nerves

Post by ttf_MikeBMiller »

Quote from: Dombat on May 31, 2017, 04:23PM
My other tips would be to take 3 or 4 positive ideas in with you. You said you made it through bolero. This means that you thought you wouldn't or you have a negative approach to playing it. Take your tempo, breathe and play clearly and cleanly... It needs practice but is it really that hard?



I was happy to make it through Bolero as at my first ever pro level audition, I nailed the start of Bolero and then completely clammed the high Db's. That has been bugging me for 10 years.

ttf_MikeBMiller
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Audition nerves

Post by ttf_MikeBMiller »

So, to slightly change the subject, do you guys (and ladies) think it is realistic or even possible to go from being a good amateur player to someone who can do well at a pro level audition? By pro level, I mean with a local or regional orchestra that does 4 or 5 concerts a year, not the NY Phil or anything. There are a good number of those orchestras within 100 miles of me. I have managed to get on the sub list for 2 of them, but one of those has never called me to actually play. The other (my hometown orchestra) has called me for 2 Christmas concerts.

Sometimes I feel a bit like Mr. Tanner in the Harry Chapin song.
ttf_kbiggs
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Audition nerves

Post by ttf_kbiggs »

To your most recent question: yes, of course it's possible. The fact that you've asked the question shows (a) you would like to improve to the point where you are able to do so, and (b) you have doubts about your ability to do so.

Auditioning is a skill, just like many other aspects of playing the trombone, and has to be learned. (Making music is, of course, a different matter.) There are lots of different resources available for audition preparation that address nerves, approaching different pieces, learning to let go of mistakes in the moment, etc. Here are a few online sources I've found helpful:

http://www.yeodoug.com/resources/symphony_auditions/yeoauditions.html
http://www.bulletproofmusician.com
http://jayfriedman.net/articles

There are many others. Just search a bit and you'll find them.

I believe all these (and other) resources share a common approach, what is generally called mindfulness: paying attention to one thing at a time, on purpose, in the present moment, without judgment. That's Jon Kabat Zinn's definition; he's a psychologist, Buddhist, and meditation instructor. (BTW: you don't have to be a Buddhist or any other religion to practice mindfulness meditation. At it's simplest, it is just a technique for quieting and focusing the mind.)

I try to look at it this way: In any playing situation, whether it's a performance, an audition, a rehearsal, or a practice session, my purpose is to focus on what I want to accomplish. Anything that gets in the way of that goal or accomplishment, whether it's improving the breath marks and phrasing in a Rochut etude or the intonation in a diminished chord or the quality and approach of the high Db's in Bolero, is distraction. My responsibility as a musician, then, is to eliminate or manage all the things that can distract me from my purpose.

Pe = Po - D

Performance equals Potential minus Distraction

Pe = your ability in the moment
Po = preparation, skill, ability, education, training, experience
D = anything that distracts from Pe, like:

Thoughts of "what's for lunch," "did I pay the gas bill," "Will I hit the high Db?" "I didn't do the Remington flexibility study #x as part of my warm-up," "There's Joe S from the last audition. He won that audition, so why is he here for this one?," etc.,
Mechanical stuff like, is your slide well lubed up? Is your valve sticky? Have you fixed that pesky retaining screw?
Music: Is your music bound in a book and marked, or is it all loose and liable to blow away at the worst moment possible?

Control the variables you can, and let go of the rest.
ttf_MikeBMiller
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Audition nerves

Post by ttf_MikeBMiller »

Thank you! That's great advice.
ttf_FlamingRain
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Audition nerves

Post by ttf_FlamingRain »

Most of this thread is great advice but here's my 2c (if it means anything to you):

The best performances I have given have always when I have been concerned about the music and not myself. This is a very difficult mental skill to cultivate. The paradoxical situation is that you have to care about what you are doing and be honoest with yourself to improve. However, on the stage you cannot do that. Three things have helped me progress in performance scenarios this year:
1) working on my mindfulness - kbiggs touched on this - I have worked through some mindfulness exercises and meditation routines in the Headspace program, which have improved my personal overall focus and clarity.
2) practicing performing, and performing with a good mindset. Practicing performing in front of peers, others, even out in the street or in the lobby can help you get used to performing.
3) Having a good performing mindset. In the moment I create a story that I think fits with the music and try to tell that story, and then singing it in both your mind and through the horn. It is not abbout you, it is about the music.   You have to trust your preparation and just let go and realize that you are going to deliver at the best level that you have practiced. This is is a skill that has to be practiced as well. Everyone misses a note or two here or there. I have watched professionals frack. Those don't matter if your musical product is convincing. Communicate the story of the music your audience, and everything else doesn't matter.

For about a year and a half or so I was on a streak of performances that I would get very nervous for and I would get caught in my head about what others thought about me. I would get nervous and second guess myself at exposed sections even in ensembles, and it wasn't until the last 6 months that I started being more mindful, practiced more mindfully, practiced performing and changed my mindset that I started having great results and feeling great about performances. I won the university Concerto Competition which is extremely competitive, and as a result performing is fun again.

Just my thoughts! Hope this helps you!
ttf_anonymous
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Audition nerves

Post by ttf_anonymous »

Things like dry mouth, shaky vibrato, and other similar symptoms are the body's normal response to stress and anxiety. First, it's important to accept that you can't avoid them and that it is counterproductive to fret over their onset.  The catch-22 of nervous reactions are that denying them will most assuredly worsen the symptom.  While you will never welcome their appearance, being unafraid of them and "allowing" yourself the space and acceptance of your nervousness is often enough to lessen their severity and overall impact on your playing.  Expect and a little dry mouth etc.; it's natural and you WILL have instances of it. Often, just knowing in advance that you're prepared and accepting of having to play through it calmly will help you cope with it give you license to relax. In summary, don't fear it and it won't consume you.

Secondly, shallow breathing is THE primary symptom of nervousness or anxiety.  Fortunately, it can be directly countered.
Consciously and frequently force yourself to take slow, relaxed, and deep breathes between each excerpt. In the warm-up/lead-up time before the round, repeatedly practice slow, deep breathing every few minutes. You'll slow your heart rate and actually feel the relaxing effects almost immediately. Hope this helps. 
ttf_Gabe Langfur
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Audition nerves

Post by ttf_Gabe Langfur »

Quote from: MikeBMiller on Jun 01, 2017, 06:43AMSo, to slightly change the subject, do you guys (and ladies) think it is realistic or even possible to go from being a good amateur player to someone who can do well at a pro level audition?
Is it possible? Sure, anything is possible.

However...the people who do well at pro level auditions have typically devoted years of their lives to the art not only of playing music well and playing that instrument well, but also at auditioning well. Countless hours of lessons, countless hours in the practice room, mock auditions, recording themselves, etc. They took auditions to get into the best youth orchestras, then the best music schools, then every year if not every semester for the ensembles at those music schools, summer festivals, etc.

And they did all of that like their lives depended on it. Because they did. When I was in music school, nothing mattered to me as much as learning to play as well as I possibly could. Nothing.

You know what else most of them do? They take adrenalin-blocking medications so that the body doesn't go into the involuntary fight-or-flight mechanism you experienced. Not everybody does it, but at this point I'll bet a solid majority do. I won some of auditions and did very well at some others without the drugs, but that was at a time when they weren't in such widespread use. Now when I take an audition I take 10mg of Propanalol.

There are a lot of other important steps to take to focus your mind on the moment the way you need to do do well at an audition, but the drugs help a lot.
ttf_harrison.t.reed
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Audition nerves

Post by ttf_harrison.t.reed »

I was gonna say, even Weston Sprott advocates drugs. I thought all the pros were strung out. Propanolol is probably better than the stuff Coltrane was doing. Well, not better, but not as bad for you.

Actually, how does one get a prescription for beta blockers to use for nerves? I thought it was only prescribed for high blood presure?
ttf_kbiggs
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Audition nerves

Post by ttf_kbiggs »

I've use propranolol in the past, too. I have used it for brief periods (5-6 performances) when I've had an increase in overall anxiety, but especially when I've had a string of performances that were negatively affected by nerves. It helped to reset my state of mind and relearn what it was like to perform without a racing heart, dry mouth, racing thoughts, etc. You know: the typical fight, flight or freeze responses.

You can get propranolol from your doctor, NP, primary care person, etc. It is an "off label" prescription: the medication can be used to treat condition y, but was originally developed to treat condition x.  Tell them you've been having problems with performance anxiety, tell them your symptoms, ask them what they suggest. If you intend to use it only for auditions, tell them that: just be honest with them. I'm not a doctor, but I have heard of some cases where propranolol wasn't prescribed--it was contraindicated due to another medical condition. There are other beta blockers out there that almost certainly can be prescribed in such cases, as I've been told.

Beta blockers can help, but they have their down sides. Some people describe a "don't care" or ambivalence about performing, a kind of motivational numbing, if you will. I have heard anecdotally that that effect can either increase with use or decrease with use. I noticed it the last few times I used it. I haven't used a beta blocker in years, but I haven't had any professional or semi-professional auditions in over 5 years, and a lot has changed with me mentally and physically... most of it good, a lot age-related... some interesting... it's change.
ttf_harrison.t.reed
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Audition nerves

Post by ttf_harrison.t.reed »

 Image

the more you know!

I bet the Army wouldn't ever prescribe it for me.
ttf_timothy42b
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Audition nerves

Post by ttf_timothy42b »

Harrison,
I've always believed military musicians should be exempt from drug testing.

I asked my primary care doc for xanax for dental anxiety. He had no problem prescribing a small amount.
ttf_harrison.t.reed
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Audition nerves

Post by ttf_harrison.t.reed »

Nah we get tested every month. Too many musicians would be hitting the wetted dank blunts up in here if they didn't test hahaha! I personally feel like drugs are never good and avoid even ibuprofen like the plague, but I have to admit that it'd be great to feel a bit calmer during a performance.
ttf_Gabe Langfur
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Audition nerves

Post by ttf_Gabe Langfur »

I've had two doctors who were happy to give me a prescription for exactly what I use it for.
ttf_harrison.t.reed
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Audition nerves

Post by ttf_harrison.t.reed »

Very very interesting. ...  Image
ttf_bigbassbone1
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Audition nerves

Post by ttf_bigbassbone1 »

Ive never heard of any musician here denied a prescription for beta blockers if they explain they are for performance.

I have not tried them for a few reasons.... firstly, there are ways to channel that nervous energy into positive energy during an audition. Being in the heat of battle can lift your performance if you know how to use the energy in the right way. I would encourage anyone who is using drugs in auditions  (and anyone else for that matter!) To check out Don Greene's work on audition coaching. His method is incredibly helpful and explains how to audition without drugs.

Another reason I would choose not to use the drugs is that I do not want to develop a complex in my head that I cannot audition without them. If something happened on an audition day and I was unable to bring or use the drugs, the thought running around in my head that I dont have them and the folowing trails of thought consequences are thoughts I could do without in an audition scenario.

ttf_kbiggs
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Audition nerves

Post by ttf_kbiggs »

Quote from: bigbassbone1 on Jun 07, 2017, 05:40PMIve never heard of any musician here denied a prescription for beta blockers if they explain they are for performance.

I have not tried them for a few reasons.... firstly, there are ways to channel that nervous energy into positive energy during an audition. Being in the heat of battle can lift your performance if you know how to use the energy in the right way. I would encourage anyone who is using drugs in auditions  (and anyone else for that matter!) To check out Don Greene's work on audition coaching. His method is incredibly helpful and explains how to audition without drugs.

Another reason I would choose not to use the drugs is that I do not want to develop a complex in my head that I cannot audition without them. If something happened on an audition day and I was unable to bring or use the drugs, the thought running around in my head that I dont have them and the folowing trails of thought consequences are thoughts I could do without in an audition scenario.


It's nice to hear that you have been able to manage the nervousness and stress of auditions without using beta blockers. I think you're saying that, all things being equal, it's probably best to err on the side of caution and not decide to use beta blockers (or other performance enhancing chemicals) if you can manage the nerves by other means. For me, and for the brief therapeutic times I planned to use them, they were very helpful. "Planned" is the operative word here. I had a plan to use them for a brief interval, a plan to follow up with my doctor, a plan to not use them for a trial period, and a contingency plan to use them again in future if need be.

If I were a different person--less nervous or anxious, perhaps a little more self-aware, if I had had more willingness and discipline as a young man to really address some of the things that got in the way of my plan for success--perhaps I would not have made the decision to use them when I did. C'est la vie.

I've read some of Don Greene's stuff, but haven't put it into practice. I found it helpful, though, and I recommend it. Perhaps I will follow your (and my!) recommendation. This: http://www.bulletproofmusician.com is another excellent resource.

I also just found this: http://www.musicforbrass.com/articles/conquer-performance-anxiety.html. It's a link to another website, but some very helpful suggestions for your intention when you walk out on stage, which is the stage where performance anxiety is usually at its peak--just before you start to play, a most vulnerable time for musicians.

Personally, I did not experience the complex you describe: "I can't audition without them, where'd I put them?!? Aaauuugh! Whudamigonnadonooooowwww!?!?!" For me, planning was important. I worked with my doctor, came up with a plan, adjusted it as necessary, and continued. Had I not planned it out, though, I can certainly see how that kind of situation could easily occur: panic, disorder, chaos.. the enemies of mindfulness.
ttf_MikeBMiller
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Audition nerves

Post by ttf_MikeBMiller »

Although I have no plans to used beta blockers, I have one question - if you plan to use them in an audition, do you practice with them?
ttf_kbiggs
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Audition nerves

Post by ttf_kbiggs »

Yes. Remove the variables. Know what it's like to play on them so that when you are in the audition, it's an expected feeling.
ttf_Gabe Langfur
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Audition nerves

Post by ttf_Gabe Langfur »

Quote from: MikeBMiller on Jun 09, 2017, 01:22PMAlthough I have no plans to used beta blockers, I have one question - if you plan to use them in an audition, do you practice with them?

Not all the time, but it's a good idea to try them for a couple of mock auditions.
ttf_Gabe Langfur
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Audition nerves

Post by ttf_Gabe Langfur »

Quote from: MikeBMiller on Jun 09, 2017, 01:22PMAlthough I have no plans to used beta blockers, I have one question - if you plan to use them in an audition, do you practice with them?

Not all the time, but it's a good idea to try them for a couple of mock auditions.
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