Performance Anxiety only for specific ensembles

[ttf_Johnston93]

Hi all,

Normally my performance anxiety, is not something that has bothered me, it has been a slight case of adrenaline that actually adds to my focus to help me play better.
In ensembles like: Orchestra, solo with piano, big band, I tend to be calm and the performances go well, but when it comes to chamber music (mostly ensembles of six or less) I get quite a high level of nerves that I don't get while playing in an octet, or larger ensemble. The stranger thing is, playing trombone alone, or with a pianist gives me less fear than a trombone duet, or a brass quintet. Any thoughts to why?

Thank you,

[ttf_BGuttman]

Could you be having tuning anxiety?  Tuning errors are much more pronounced in small ensemble playing and you need to be able to adjust quickly and on the fly to anything that happens.

I wonder if some time playing against shifting drone tones might help.

[ttf_Doug Elliott]

I used to get a bit of that playing with certain people who I thought would be likely to hear my weaknesses - you're so exposed in chamber music.

Then I figured out that everybody has weaknesses, even the best players, so I stopped worrying about it.

[ttf_Le.Tromboniste]

I have the same thing. I think it has to do in part with playing with people far better than I am and who I know are capable to hear every good and less good thing I do (and who also might or might not hire me in the future...). And in part just the context. Might be the same for you : I don't mind screwing up something in a solo piece as much, as I don't get the feeling of not ruining somebody else's performance...


It's really weird how our brain is wired. I played Mahler 3 in front of 2500 people and was very focused and only slightly nervous (more excited than anything else really), and then on one of my most recent sackbut performance, which was merely in front of 40 people, I was more anxious than I've been in years....

[ttf_savio]

It might have to do with how often we play in a specific setting. I get a little fear when playing in an orchestra. I only do it two or three times in a year. It might has to do with what public we have. I feel a little more scary when there is musicians in the audience. Like a bunch of trombone players. I also get a little nervous when the music I play is a little over my head. Also when the audience is few people. But a little bit of nerves can actually be good also.

Leif

[ttf_kbiggs]

Nerves and nervousness mean anxiety about the future: "What if I screw up?" Everybody screws up. Worrying about screwing up causes anxiety, which stimulates the sympathetic nervous system (SNS), that is, adrenaline and other hormones and neurotransmitters that give us the "fight, flight or freeze" feeling.

My opinion: The best long-term antidotes are meditation to develop mindfulness (especially vipassana meditation), preparation (not just practice, but also visualization and other skills), and acceptance. See the following for some specific tips and courses related to music: 

https://bulletproofmusician.com
http://www.musicforbrass.com/articles/conquer-performance-anxiety.html

Some people use beta blockers (cardiac medication) to interrupt the SNS response. It's another option that can be very helpful in severe and specific cases. Do a search here on TTF.

[ttf_Arrowhead99]

Those smaller group settings often have very exposed parts; it's quite normal to have some anxiety about trying to play them, and I have experienced the same 
Often the composers or arrangers for those groups fill up the parts so there's just nowhere to breathe (marches especially); it can help to lay out a measure or two to help yourself catch a breath.
It can also depend on how well you know the group members and getting used to their approach to tuning. If you're sitting in with folks who you're not familiar with, it's natural to have some sort of anxiety about the situation 
You could request to sit down with one of the members of the group to "go over" certain pieces that exposed parts so you get more familiar with what's going on around you while you're playing. Perhaps there is a "kindred spirit" in the group who you could rehearse with,etc.
Again, I think it's important to realize that feeling anxiety about playing in a certain situation (even if you've been playing for decades) is normal.  Ofcourse, all you can do is try to take steps to diffuse the situation so that the whole experience becomes much more relaxing

[ttf_Full Pedal Trombonist]

small combos do it for me. And it is because of tuning and matching articulations. Being exposed and being aware of it is something you can get over by knowing you've practiced enough to get it right. Also recording in any band because there's much more at stake. Once it goes right perfectly the next time will be easier. I would think. Personally I have a very hard time hearing if I'm sharp, but not flat.

[ttf_tbathras]

Quote from: Doug Elliott on Yesterday at 07:56 PMI used to get a bit of that playing with certain people who I thought would be likely to hear my weaknesses - you're so exposed in chamber music.

Then I figured out that everybody has weaknesses, even the best players, so I stopped worrying about it.

I think this right here is an invaluable piece of wisdom.

This rings true for me, and this is one of those things that is self-perpetuating. If you go into something with shaky confidence (even if only subconsciously) because of worrying what others may think or how you'll perform, it won't go well - even if that anxiety or doubt is actually totally unfounded.

This is something I worked though in one of the groups I play in: I literally thought I was honestly the worst player in the group (a 50ish person 1-per-part wind orchestra comprised of pro and semi pro musicians, whereas I'm just an amateur that didn't study music in college). I was invited to play because someone else was unavailable and they needed 2 bass 'bones for the group's inaugural concert.  Now I've been with them for over 2 years and am one of the few people to have performed in every concert since, despite my being shaken up so much after one performance over a year ago that I told the MD he should probably try to find someone else next time.

I'm sure my feelings of doubt and anxiety would have increase exponentially if the group were smaller (actually, the first few brass-only fanfares we did, that happened).

The more comfortable I get, the more I notice that everyone has hiccups or other imperfections and yet the ensemble still sounds amazing.

[ttf_timothy42b]

Ironically I have more fear now than ever before.

When there was so much stuff I couldn't do, I didn't worry about it as much.

I've made a lot of progress in the last 2 or 3 years and I think I'm much improved.  Now I should be able to play some of that better, but being human I don't always do it. 

I'm also able to hear myself better, though that's still a work in progress, and I hear sloppiness I didn't notice before. 

[ttf_Geezerhorn]

Quote from: timothy42b on Aug 16, 2017, 08:05AMIronically I have more fear now than ever before.

When there was so much stuff I couldn't do, I didn't worry about it as much.

I've made a lot of progress in the last 2 or 3 years and I think I'm much improved.  Now I should be able to play some of that better, but being human I don't always do it. 

I'm also able to hear myself better, though that's still a work in progress, and I hear sloppiness I didn't notice before. 

I know exactly what you mean, Tim. The better I get, the more I don't love how I play.

Now I'm all in a tizzy over which horn to use for which specific purpose. I have my at-home jazzer horn, my church ensemble horn and my town band horn. I am no longer in a street band, so thank goodness I don't have to worry about blowing my honker horn any more. And don't get me started on which mpc all-in-the-rim-family cup/bore/back-bore to use with each one!

I kinda either envy or hate those who can either mindlessly or artfully play the very same set-up for entirely different venues. Grrrr.

...Geezer

[ttf_Geezerhorn]

Quote from: timothy42b on Aug 16, 2017, 08:05AMIronically I have more fear now than ever before.

When there was so much stuff I couldn't do, I didn't worry about it as much.

I've made a lot of progress in the last 2 or 3 years and I think I'm much improved.  Now I should be able to play some of that better, but being human I don't always do it. 

I'm also able to hear myself better, though that's still a work in progress, and I hear sloppiness I didn't notice before. 

I know exactly what you mean, Tim. The better I get, the more I don't love how I play.

Now I'm all in a tizzy over which horn to use for which specific purpose. I have my at-home jazzer horn, my church ensemble horn and my town band horn. I am no longer in a street band, so thank goodness I don't have to worry about blowing my honker horn any more. And don't get me started on which mpc all-in-the-rim-family cup/bore/back-bore to use with each one!

I kinda either envy or hate those who can either mindlessly or artfully play the very same set-up for entirely different venues. Grrrr.

...Geezer