Is Shires the Krispy Kreme of Trombone manufacturers?

[ghmerrill]

Everybody likes a little locust bean gum. And it IS vegan. Now the sorbitan monostearate may be a bit more questionable, but you don't want your donut falling apart as you're gobbling it. Just because the monocalcium phosphate is often used as a fertilizer doesn't mean ... well, I'll pass on that one.

In fact, however, the most dangerous thing for me isn't the funny sounding additives -- it's the DONUT!!

[BGuttman]

They are required to reveal all ingredients -- that's a food law. You can hide "trade secret" ingredients from an MSDS for another product. Note that while they must divulge all ingredients, they do not have to divulge exact formulas. I can make a product with the same materials in different concentrations and the result can be "delicious" or "nauseating" depending on percentages and how they are processed.

The "bad actor" in the Krispy Kreme formula is the glaze. The contents of the donut underneath is not materially different from any other donut.

[ghmerrill]

The "bad actor" in the Krispy Kreme formula is the glaze.

Whatever may be in it, just thinking about it raises glucose your glucose level.

[OneTon]

I had high hopes for a really good conspiracy theory. After all, when it comes to yeast, there’s fungus and then there’s fungus.

[ghmerrill]

There is always fungus amongus.

[OneTon]

Shires’ yellow brass bells are actually made from recycled Zildjan cymbals. That accounts for their sweet sound.

[harrisonreed]

"it's people... Soylent Q is made out of people"

[Doug Elliott]

Try finding ANY prepared food that doesn't have those ingredients.

[chromebone]

Trying to see the parallel here.

Let's for the sake of argument say that an FE Olds is similar to a Ford? Or mayhaps Olds:White Castle

More like Studebaker, being as they’re long out of business.

[RustBeltBass]

An inferior donut shop in the US

Easy there, Partner.

[ghmerrill]

An inferior donut shop in the US

Easy there, Partner.

One might wonder if "inferior donut shop" is an oxymoron and whether the concept of a superior donut shop isn't a fiction of some elitist subculture. It's not like we're talking about ...

beignets.jpg

[tbdana]

Is Bach the Jack In The Box taco of the trombone?

[ghmerrill]

Or the Jack in the Bach [rim shot!]

[harrisonreed]

Easy there, Partner.

One might wonder if "inferior donut shop" is an oxymoron and whether the concept of a superior donut shop isn't a fiction of some elitist subculture. It's not like we're talking about ...
beignets.jpg

Look, I can't help anyone who hasn't had a LaMar's old fashioned sour cream donut. You can't know things you haven't experienced. You walk out of LaMar's and you'd be like:

"I've seen things you people wouldn't believe... Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion... I watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhäuser Gate."

[ghmerrill]

Something really bad happened a long time ago when people started putting stuff on the pure donut or making pieces of cake with holes in them and calling them donuts. You can't hardly get a good genuine donut any more. I've had it with these space-age post-modern designer donut-like objects.

[imsevimse]

This is the weirdest thread so far. I've read all of it and do not understand anything. Never been a donut expert which makes all this pointless.
To me your arguments makes as much sense as:
Yamaha = apple
Conn = grape
Bach = banana
Olds = tomato
See my point, it does not contain anything useful, but obviously you understand what you are talking about. Guess it's a language/culture thing I can never understand. Please go on and I will get my popcorn.

/Tom

[WilliamLang]

pretty solid fruit comparisons actually

[Posaunus]

This is the weirdest thread so far. I've read all of it and do not understand anything. Never been a donut expert which makes all this pointless.
To me your arguments makes as much sense as:
Yamaha = apple
Conn = grape
Bach = banana
Olds = tomato
See my point, it does not contain anything useful, but obviously you understand what you are talking about. Guess it's a language/culture thing I can never understand. Please go on and I will get my popcorn.

/Tom

Tom is right. Scientists would call this food synesthesia. It's only relevant to the one with those same tastes.

For some music synesthesiasts, A# Major is green, c minor is red, etc.

Apparently for some trombone synesthesiasts, Shires is Krispy Kreme. Makes just as much sense.

[musicofnote]

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[ghmerrill]

While I admire much about the Swiss system, have always felt very comfortable in Switzerland, love to visit it, have worked in Switzerland (for a Swiss company), and have somewhat emotional ties particularly to Basel because of working there and because my Ph.D. advisor was from there (and from an old family-owned flour milling company), when you look at

These farmers are producing "bio" because of higher moral values. The profit margin is higher - especially because they don't need the chemical fertilisers and chemical pesticides.

You should at least realistically recognize the dissonance between the initial moral claim and the immediately following economic justification in terms of why farmers "are producing bio," and what allows them to continue to do that effectively. But again, you have to admire a nation which has such excellent supermarkets in train stations and produces such wonderfully tasteful health foods as rösti (which my wife absolutely adores).

[Posaunus]

... you have to admire a nation which ... produces such wonderfully tasteful health foods as rösti.

Rösti = crispy Swiss potato pancake. Shredded potatoes formed into a thick pancake and fried in butter, oil, or ghee. Sort of like hash browns formed into a pancake, or latkes without eggs or flour. I'm not sure that I would categorize this is a "health food!"

I just returned from Basel where we enjoyed a Rösti dinner at Restauration zur Harmonie. Mine came with a wonderful Kalbsbratwurst (veal sausage) and onion; my wife's Rösti was coated with melted raclette cheese. The meal was delicious, but ... healthy?

[musicofnote]

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[musicofnote]

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[ghmerrill]

Apparently the Swiss do like a good American "donut" (I use the term in it's current post-modern sense) when they can get one. There are Krispy Kreme shops in Lausanne and Geneva, and Dunkin' Donuts in Zurich (3), Basel (1), Geneva (2), Emmen, Bern (3), Urtenen-Schonbuhl (sorry re missing umlauts: I don't have my German keyboard working on Chromebook yet), Hinwil, Friburg, Biel, St. Gallen, Olten, and Interlaken. Of course, perhaps it's only American tourists who buy and eat all these donuts.

For my own part, I'm partial to the bretzel, adorned only with salt.

[JeffBone44]

Yes, they are both severely overrated & overpriced.

[JeffBone44]

This is the weirdest thread so far. I've read all of it and do not understand anything. Never been a donut expert which makes all this pointless.
To me your arguments makes as much sense as:
Yamaha = apple
Conn = grape
Bach = banana
Olds = tomato
See my point, it does not contain anything useful, but obviously you understand what you are talking about. Guess it's a language/culture thing I can never understand. Please go on and I will get my popcorn.

/Tom

Popcorn? I think that = Holton

[greenbean]

What is Krispy Kreme?

Donuts that look great! But are overly sweet and, in the end, disappointing.

[Mikebmiller]

I love me some Krispy Kreemes. There is one about 100 yards down the road from where I grew up going to church and we would often skip Sunday school to go get a doughnut. I rarely go there now, but if I see a box laying around at one of my customers' offices, I have to have one just for old times sake. Even if they are 2 days old.

As far as Shires trombones, I have never owned one, but they seem like darn nice horns. I got a Rath in 2016 and suspect that it will last me the rest of my life.

[mwpfoot]

Donuts make my tummy hurt so they are all trumpets. Dunkin? Trumpets. Krispy? Trumpets. That little shack that switches to fried chicken at lunch time? Trumpet doublers.

[ghmerrill]

Even if they are 2 days old.

They age relatively well, but (like IPA) that may have been a significant part of the design spec.

[greenbean]

The best donuts, you ask?

Stan's Donuts in (Westwood) Los Angeles.

[tbdana]

Y'all dissin' Krispy Kremes be nasty. There's nuthin' better than a fresh, hot, Krispy Kreme glaze donut.

[Burgerbob]

Some people think that about Shires too...

[OneTon]

Kristy Kreme Doughnuts are more like Yamaha Intermediate trombones. The Yamaha trombone is mostly yellow brass bell and yellow brass slide, a solid performer, with no surprises. A 1960s to 1970s King 2B is like a chocolate cream filled elclair: Enticing to the eye and full of rich harmonics that light up when it is attacked with a fully supported column of air. The Shires trombones that I own are more like hot Quaker Oats cereal with nothing added but raisins on top. Solid performer. No surprises. And very nutritious. But arguably not significantly better than the store bought house brand with house brand raisins: Think Kuhnl & Hoyer or Schilke built Greenhoe.

Top: Oatmeal
Middle: Krispy Kreme Glazed Doughnut
Bottom: chocolate eclair

[harrisonreed]

I ain't knocking Shires. Especially the ones from when Steve was there -- Shires slides are up there with the Eastlake Conn slides in terms of action, and I mean that as the highest compliment possible. With all the options, they are so all over the place though. I've tried a few that were *spectacular* and a few that were supposed to be like Bach that were not fun to play at all. And then the story of the guy who went to Shires and asked for the reddest trombone he could get, with an oversized red bell. I guess the thing was almost 100% red brass, and played like it to boot.

To liken that to Krispy Kreme though seems like a disservice. Does Krispy Kreme have that kind of variety? Will they make you a donut that consists of only cocoa powder and nothing else, because you wanted the darkest tasting donut of all time? I don't think so! And their slides are garbage.

[OneTon]

All of the Krispy Kreme doughnuts that I have tasted are like raw sugar. I never tried one with Yamaha Slide Lubricant. But I think I’ll take Harrison’s word for the quality of Krispy Kreme slides. There was a thread a year or so ago about overpriced trombones. Shires hardly got mentioned if at all. I don’t know whether that is good or bad.

[ghmerrill]

I never tried one with Yamaha Slide Lubricant.

Now that you mention it, the icing on them does look a lot like Yamaha Slide Lubricant.

[tbdana]

I never tried one with Yamaha Slide Lubricant.

Now that you mention it, the icing on them does look a lot like Yamaha Slide Lubricant.

This is the best thread ever.

And now I'll never be able to eat a glazed Krispy Kreme without thinking it's covered in Yamasnot.

[JKBone85]

Most certainly not inferior to Dunkin. Quite the opposite.

I didn't say anything about Dunkin'. Krispy Kreme is full of chemicals and preservatives -- their donuts are gross. Krispy Kreme and Dunkin' shouldn't even register on the scale.

If comparing trombone shops to donut shops, I'd say Edwards at least is on par with LaMar's. The 396-A is like their old fashioned sour cream donut. The jury is out for me on Shires. Certainly not a Krispy Kreme equivalent, though -- that joint doesn't even know how to spell words, let alone make donuts.

I was trying to point out that even though KK is an inferior donut to many, Dunkin is not one of them. They are both terrible. It's also strange to make a donut analogy and not compare us to Dunkin Donuts. We are literally down the road from their headquarters.

[ghmerrill]

And now I'll never be able to eat a glazed Krispy Kreme without thinking it's covered in Yamasnot.

I think you can probably comfort yourself in this regard with the thought that use of Yamasnot (even in production quantities) would likely make the Krispy Kreme prohibitively expensive. There's barely enough in one bottle for a single donut -- not that I've actually tried that.

[OneTon]

It's also strange to make a donut analogy and not compare us to Dunkin Donuts. We are literally down the road from their headquarters.

TMI.

[harrisonreed]

It's also strange to make a donut analogy and not compare us to Dunkin Donuts. We are literally down the road from their headquarters.

TMI.

I didn't write that

[OneTon]

Sorry Harrison.

[Bach5G]

93 replies. Amazing.

[harrisonreed]

Sorry Harrison.

It's okay. it's all donuts under the bridge. Krispy Kreme ones, that is. I would never throw good donuts into the river.

[KWL]

93 replies. Amazing.

At one point there was hope for this thread with the drift to the Rösti discussion.

Ken

[BrassSection]

Had a Krispy Kreme in our area. I didn’t like them, evidently a lot of people didn’t, they didn't last very long before they closed down. Dunkin…enjoyed them many moons ago when they first opened near me. 10 cents each or a buck a dozen. My cousin and I agree they have gone downhill fast the last ten years, and he’s in the Baltimore market. Summary, DD is over priced and over rated. Best donuts I ever had here were from an Amish town about 45 minutes away. Opened at 5 AM and closed when he ran out, usually by 9 AM. Alas, after several years Sweeties closed down.

[ghmerrill]

Can't y'all get Krispy Kremes in your local Food Lion or Piggly Wiggly's? No need for a dedicated Krispy Kreme store. What kind of deprived areas do people live in that they can't just go into the local grocery or drug store and pick up a box of Krispy Kremes? That would be awful.

[flyingcow]

Can't y'all get Krispy Kremes in your local Food Lion or Piggly Wiggly's? No need for a dedicated Krispy Kreme store. What kind of deprived areas do people live in that they can't just go into the local grocery or drug store and pick up a box of Krispy Kremes? That would be awful.

A Krispy Kreme isn't a Krispy Kreme unless the red light is on.

[Posaunus]

Can't y'all get Krispy Kremes in your local Food Lion or Piggly Wiggly's? No need for a dedicated Krispy Kreme store. What kind of deprived areas do people live in that they can't just go into the local grocery or drug store and pick up a box of Krispy Kremes? That would be awful.

Yum. Stale, overly-sugared, chemically-contaminated donuts in a box. To me that "would be awful!"

Y'all in the south seem to have succumbed to some sort of unhealthy addiction to this life-shortening junk food.